You know the moms who have perfectly blown out hair, flawless makeup, they’re dressed in something other than athleisure wear, they’re homes are decorated like a magazine ad, and they’re ALWAYS on time?? Well….that’s not me. Not even close. I’m a PROUD hot mess mom. Hand to God, I went to a friends house for dinner tonight, and in the milliseconds it took me to hold my daughter and walk 2 feet into the other room to grab her diaper (that I originally forgot to bring in), my pantsless beauty peed down the entire left side of my body. #hotmessmom
So if you’re reading this and you DIDN’T use dry shampoo today, stop reading. This isn’t for you. For everyone else –
Here are 9 signs that you be a HOT MESS MOM too! Embrace the GLORIOUS mess that you are.
- You’ve worn, in public, only ONE of something that actually requires a pair. One earring, one eye lined, nails painted only on one hand (True story; I actually feel asleep in between painting hands. #hotmessmom)
- You’ve had to defend your parenting methods by lying and saying, “So I actually read this article that said…”, Yea the article was written by GFY on myob.com. My kids aren’t perfect and I don’t have the time or energy to explain to you why. Thanks though!
- You’ve spilled coffee/milk/juice/or have been peed on .5 seconds before leaving your house…and because you’re already running late, you end up wearing that shirt for the rest of the day. Bonus points if you then act like you have NO idea that the aforementioned liquid is on your shirt. “Oh my gosh, is there…is there something on MY shirt? I WONDER WHAT IT COULD BE?”
- You wear your hair in a top knot at LEAST 4 days a week. Bonus points if you also wear a HAT 1 day a week! Triple bonus points if you use so much dry shampoo that you should own stock in Batiste. (If you don’t know Batiste, seriously…stop reading!)
- You’ve had to open a box of cereal/cookies/goldfish/blueberries AT Target simply to silence a screaming, whining, hungry EVEN THOUGH they just ate 45 snacks at home, child. Then at the register you say, “Oh, um, is that opened? Oh, is that already, um…empty?” OOPS!
- You’ve restarted something at least 5x during the day. Coffee, the dryer, your microwaved dinner, a TV show. (Hot mess mom tip: Get a knock-off Yeti cup (http://amzn.to/2xHDnoI) , buy Starbucks iced coffee from the refrigerated section, mix it with your favorite creamer and – VOILA, iced coffee that lasts all day! No restarting necessary.)
- You’ve stirred a homemade cocktail using a toddler’s spoon. Or eaten your cold as ice dinner with a toddler fork. Because why dirty another utensil.
- You’ve added a few ingredients to a frozen lean cuisine meal and served it to your family as a fresh – made from scratch – I slaved over this for HOURS – homemade meal. “Isn’t this delicious?! Do you think I should like – start a food blog?!”
- You’ve had to resort to getting your hair cut at a kiddie salon (because it’s just a trim and it’ll save time right?) and bonus points if you left with surprise BANGS! TRUEEEEEEEST STORY OF MY LIFE FRIENDS!!!
*This post contains affliate links.
Celebrate your BEST #hotmessmom moments below!