Some of my days go perfectly according to plan. There are days when everyone gets along and naps and plays and eats at the precise times I hoped for. Other days my son gets 5 stitches and my daughter takes my leftover Chick-Fil-A salad container out of the garbage and douses herself in avocado ranch dressing. It’s called BALANCE.
But truthfully, I don’t believe in “balance”. I was recently venting to a friend about all I had going on and she told me, “your life is always crazy though. It’s always a little chaotic. But so is everyone else’s.” And it’s true! So I can’t and won’t feed you any tales of balancing it all. Because I don’t. I don’t even know what that would look like! And you already know that you need to take time for yourself and say ‘NO’ when you feel overcommitted so I’m not telling you THAT either.
What I will tell you is that I’ve found ways to simplify. I’ve found systems and methods that help me to slow down and be less of a hot mess mom. Tricks of the trade, if you will, that make my life slightly less chaotic.
There are some pregnancy issues that are simply par for the course; back pain, waddling, discomfort. Happens to everyone. Right? Just grin and bear it. Or…DON’T.
Contrary to what you may have heard, you can and should have a PAINLESS pregnancy. The truth is that the discomfort you are experiencing is actually a sign of musculoskeletal dysfunction. It’s extremely common during pregnancy, but not normal. If your pain is so severe that it is interfering with basic, everyday functioning then you should speak with your doctor, and as a team, devise a plan for physical treatment. Moms-to-be, please know that your pain and suffering should NOT be growing as rapidly as your abdomen.
I’m going to let you in on a little secret that I hope will soon be common knowledge. There is an ENTIRE branch of Physical Therapy dedicated to YOUR pre-natal and postnatal care. We are Women’s Health Specialists, and obstetrics is our area of expertise! We study the system of muscles and bones in the female body as they relate to changes during and after pregnancy. We personalize treatments for your specific issues that prove to be most effective. more “Mom Boss Monday: Dr. Kathleen Vigo, Concierge Women’s Home Health Physical Therapist”…
You know the moms who have perfectly blown out hair, flawless makeup, they’re dressed in something other than athleisure wear, they’re homes are decorated like a magazine ad, and they’re ALWAYS on time?? Well….that’s not me. Not even close. I’m a PROUD hot mess mom. Hand to God, I went to a friends house for dinner tonight, and in the milliseconds it took me to hold my daughter and walk 2 feet into the other room to grab her diaper (that I originally forgot to bring in), my pantsless beauty peed down the entire left side of my body. #hotmessmom
So if you’re reading this and you DIDN’T use dry shampoo today, stop reading. This isn’t for you. For everyone else –
Here are 9 signs that you be a HOT MESS MOM too! Embrace the GLORIOUS mess that you are.
You’ve worn, in public, only ONE of something that actually requires a pair. One earring, one eye lined, nails painted only on one hand (True story; I actually feel asleep in between painting hands. #hotmessmom)
You’ve had to defend your parenting methods by lying and saying, “So I actually read this article that said…”, Yea the article was written by GFY on myob.com. My kids aren’t perfect and I don’t have the time or energy to explain to you why. Thanks though!
You’ve spilled coffee/milk/juice/or have been peed on .5 seconds before leaving your house…and because you’re already running late, you end up wearing that shirt for the rest of the day. Bonus points if you then act like you have NO idea that the aforementioned liquid is on your shirt. “Oh my gosh, is there…is there something on MY shirt? I WONDER WHAT IT COULD BE?”
You wear your hair in a top knot at LEAST 4 days a week. Bonus points if you also wear a HAT 1 day a week! Triplebonus points if you use so much dry shampoo that you should own stock in Batiste. (If you don’t know Batiste, seriously…stop reading!)
You’ve had to open a box of cereal/cookies/goldfish/blueberries AT Target simply to silence a screaming, whining, hungry EVEN THOUGH they just ate 45 snacks at home, child. Then at the register you say, “Oh, um, is that opened? Oh, is that already, um…empty?” OOPS!
You’ve restarted something at least 5x during the day. Coffee, the dryer, your microwaved dinner, a TV show. (Hot mess mom tip: Get a knock-off Yeti cup (http://amzn.to/2xHDnoI) , buy Starbucks iced coffee from the refrigerated section, mix it with your favorite creamer and – VOILA, iced coffee that lasts all day! No restarting necessary.)
You’ve stirred a homemade cocktail using a toddler’s spoon. Or eaten your cold as ice dinner with a toddler fork. Because why dirty another utensil.
You’ve added a few ingredients to a frozen lean cuisine meal and served it to your family as a fresh – made from scratch – I slaved over this for HOURS – homemade meal. “Isn’t this delicious?! Do you think I should like – start a food blog?!”
You’ve had to resort to getting your hair cut at a kiddie salon (because it’s just a trim and it’ll save time right?) and bonus points if you left with surprise BANGS! TRUEEEEEEEST STORY OF MY LIFE FRIENDS!!!
My baby girl recently turned one and I’m not quite sure how that happened. I feel like we only brought her home from the hospital last month, I’m still trying to figure out, and often failing at, this parenting 2-kids thing, and I’m definitely not back into my pre-baby clothes (that day may never actually come, and I’m okay with that…. most days). While this year feels like it’s passed in the blink of an eye, at the same time it feels like it’s been a very, very long year – mostly due to her hip dysplasia diagnosis and the countless doctors’ and hospital visits working to mend it.
But here we are, my happy and healthy, beautiful little girl is ONE! So brave, silly and dramatic, we have to celebrate this beauty. When I wasn’t busy tearing up in disbelief that a year has gone by, I was in full on party planning mode. And there’s nothing I love more than throwing a party. It gives me an excuse to get my crafting on. more “First Birthday, Mermaid Themed DIY Extravaganza”…
Are you thinking, ‘Am I a basic mom?’ Well…if you sip on PSL’s in September, rock crazy Halloween leggings in October, and search endlessly for “Fall Family Fun” events in your area, then you may be a… basic mom.
I myself am a basic mom, and I DON’T feel bad about it! I take 1200 pictures of my kids in front of pumpkins in the scorching Florida heat, and I attempt to attend every fall event I can physically get to WITH a PSL (probably iced, it’s HOT out) in hand.
Before you scroll down I just want to say – DONT be overwhelmed, pick the events that seem best for YOUR family and save those dates only!
For all my basic mamas, here is my ultimate guide to the BEST –